I've been reading more and more lately about the importance of fathers spending quality and quantity time with their children. I know most of you will say "no kidding" to that advice, but how many of us actually make it their first priority and do it? When I say first priority I mean first. That means preferring time with your kids to time in front of the TV, computer or newspaper. That means being home instead of at work or at the bar. That means running around the playground and wrestling on the ground instead of shooing them away and telling them to go play somewhere else. When you think of it that way, guilt slides in and we realize we all do these things to some degree. The truth is we can all do more to interact with our kids.
My father was one of those strong silent types. He went to work then came home an plopped down on the couch. All my friends seemed to have the same kind of Dad. It's what fathers did back then. Nothing more was expected of them and many felt uncomfortable doing anything more with their children. Today's Dads are different. We are both allowed and expected to roll up our sleeves and be hands on parents. Bringing home a paycheck is no longer our most important responsibility. We are Dads first and whatever else we do second. Instead of seeing this as an additional life burden, view it as a gift.
Of course there are limits. We would all go crazy hanging out with the monsters 24/7. The key is notching up the time without ratcheting up the stress. Primarily it's making your kids #1 in your life. This is no small task but it's probably the most important decision you will ever make. Think about it. If you're not here on Earth to raise quality children why are you here? They are your link to immortality and the greatest reflection of who you were are a person. If you have lousy kids you were probably a lousy person.
Why is it that the worst parents ignore or abuse their kids when they're small then wonder why they are delinquents when they become teenagers? The best parents do a great job and wonder what more they can do. I decided when my kids were born that they were my primary job. When I had to opportunity to take a sabbatical to be with them I jumped at the opportunity. It didn't help the career but so what. What do money, fame and the adoration of strangers mean when your kids wont come to see you when you're old? Be sure to live your life deliberately and you wont be surprised by the outcome. Invest the time and effort in your kids now and you will have a wonderful relationship with them when they grow up. If you're not going to do that then why did you have kids in the first place? You might as well enjoy them.
My father was one of those strong silent types. He went to work then came home an plopped down on the couch. All my friends seemed to have the same kind of Dad. It's what fathers did back then. Nothing more was expected of them and many felt uncomfortable doing anything more with their children. Today's Dads are different. We are both allowed and expected to roll up our sleeves and be hands on parents. Bringing home a paycheck is no longer our most important responsibility. We are Dads first and whatever else we do second. Instead of seeing this as an additional life burden, view it as a gift.
Of course there are limits. We would all go crazy hanging out with the monsters 24/7. The key is notching up the time without ratcheting up the stress. Primarily it's making your kids #1 in your life. This is no small task but it's probably the most important decision you will ever make. Think about it. If you're not here on Earth to raise quality children why are you here? They are your link to immortality and the greatest reflection of who you were are a person. If you have lousy kids you were probably a lousy person.
Why is it that the worst parents ignore or abuse their kids when they're small then wonder why they are delinquents when they become teenagers? The best parents do a great job and wonder what more they can do. I decided when my kids were born that they were my primary job. When I had to opportunity to take a sabbatical to be with them I jumped at the opportunity. It didn't help the career but so what. What do money, fame and the adoration of strangers mean when your kids wont come to see you when you're old? Be sure to live your life deliberately and you wont be surprised by the outcome. Invest the time and effort in your kids now and you will have a wonderful relationship with them when they grow up. If you're not going to do that then why did you have kids in the first place? You might as well enjoy them.
